Friday, June 1, 2018

L'Chaim (Monthly Newsletter Article) - June 2018: We Don’t Need Another Swim Club.

For the first time, Rabbi Kelilah Miller and I decided to co-write an article for the synagogue's monthly newsletter. Here's what we came up with; let me know what you think. Thanks!

Yes, you read that correctly, this is a joint message from BOTH of your rabbis. Full disclosure: Neither of us has co-authored an article before. So why do it now? We talk to one another a lot during the year (in case you didn’t know that), and often find ourselves back at the topic of building – but really deepening – community. And what better way to write about community, than to put forth a statement written, you know, communally!

As we wind down this fiscal programming year, we’re thinking back on some important, relational moments that we’ve shared. On Yom Kippur afternoon, our Q&A session with congregants included meaningful “real talk,” and got the year started off on a note of connected honesty. Later in the fall, we opened a space for challenging questions and experiences, through our first Death Café discussion. 

Our second annual FUSE 4Ever Grateful concert at Thanksgiving drew nearly 300 attendees; significantly expanding our fences and stretching our understanding of who is really in our shared sphere of responsibility. The Ohev Players’ production of “The Wizard of Oz” brought together congregants from different demographics and life experiences in a way that rarely happens. In a first, for a least the last 30 years, we joined together with members of Beth Israel for a wonderful Shabbat retreat (a Shabbaton) in April. And to mention just one more powerful experience, Rabbi Gerber recently led a Men’s Club discussion on the evolving role of masculinity, and our own understandings of what it means to “be a man.” 

Clearly, there’s a lot to be proud of. But that’s NOT why we’re mentioning these things. We want to point out what sets Ohev apart, not from other religious institutions necessarily, but from membership at, say, a swim club, a Healthplex, or a country club. There’s no shortage of activities in which to participate, or groups to which you can join; but where do you go to bring your whole self? Where can you be vulnerable, or seen, or simply allow your own internal contradictions to exist in peace??

By virtue of our rabbinic roles, we have a window into the more complicated facets of the lives of our Ohevites. We see how this congregation strives to embrace each person, no matter what s/he is dealing with, feels about her/himself and the world, or how much struggle and challenge has been endured in the past. We see the hard times, but also many beautiful moments of people going above and beyond to comfort, support, and celebrate with each other. This is not something you see in most affinity groups.

When you’re part of a community, you also learn another valuable lesson: You get out of it what you put in. And sometimes, being able to give of yourself - your time, effort, resources, and even simple presence - creates the most meaningful experiences. We especially see this in the religious school, where kids (and really, families) bring unique personalities, abilities, and knowledge, and together form a web of relationships that is much more than the sum of its parts.

So here it is: As we head off into the summer, we offer you a challenge to consider: Are you ready for a trust fall? Can you take the emotional risk of bringing your whole self along with you when you walk through the door? And if not, what do you need to get there? With the full presence of each, individual one of us, Ohev can become not just one more thing we do, but a part of who we are.

Have a great summer! 


Rabbis Gerber & Miller


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