So, we finally made it through the High Holidays. As I’m writing this, we still have a bit more to go, but certainly by the time you’re reading my article (and this whole L’Chaim issue), the holidays for the Jewish year 5782 will have concluded. All of the holidays actually fall within a single Jewish month, known as Tishrei. Oddly enough, it’s actually considered the SEVENTH month on the calendar (the first is Nisan, when we celebrate Passover), yet this is indeed the month where the number ticks over from 5781 to 5782. Leave it to our ancient rabbis to create such a confusing calendrical conundrum…
As we shift over to October, 2021, we have also moved on to another Jewish month, namely Cheshvan. Interestingly, Cheshvan is more the month’s nickname (though often the one you’ll see on calendars, in Israel, and on Jewish materials); the full name is actually Marcheshvan. This is a peculiar addition, because the word “Mar” in Hebrew means “bitter.” So the month is really named “bitter-Cheshvan.” That’s a pretty weirdthing to name a month, isn’t it?
So what’s so bitter and unpleasant (if you don’t care for that flavor…) about Marcheshvan? Well, the main thing is that there are no Jewish holidays in this entire month. It’s one of the only ones. And having completed a month filled with Rosh Hashanah, Yom Kippur, Sukkot, Hoshana Rabbah, Shemini Atzeret, AND Simchat Torah, I think it’s easy to see why celebrants of Jewish holidays might view Marcheshvan with pity and sympathy. How unfair that one month gets ‘em all, while the very next one is entirely devoid of ritual, joyous celebrations! How bitter and unfortunate indeed…
But here’s the funny irony: As someone who has to plan for, coordinate, organize, and then execute one holiday after another in Tishrei, Marcheshvan feels more like a relief and a much-needed break, rather than a sad and depressing month! Rabbis and cantors everywhere, along with congregants who make it a point to attend and observe EVERY holiday, sometimes consider the name “Marcheshvan” to be more tongue-in-cheek than anything else! Not actually bitter in the slightest, but a welcome opportunity to rest, replenish, and look ahead to lifecycle celebrations, synagogue programs, and – eventually - Chanukah and all the rest of the holidays.
I also think there’s a nice lesson in here as well, one that can apply to all of us. Sometimes what might appear to be joyful andvivacious can also feel exhausting, depleting, and overwhelming. While something quiet, unassuming, and even lonely may also be a great opportunity for self-reflection, peace, blessed silence, and mindfulness. I spoke about this during my holiday sermons, but I think sometimes in life we are quite quick to label something as “good” or “bad,” before we even really take the time to see how things play out. And perhaps rather than even try and assess the pros or cons of a situation, we should instead be thinking about how to learn and grow from EVERY experience!
I’ll admit that I am one of those rabbis who annually says “Marcheshvan” more tongue-in-cheek than anything, andwelcome the quiet and simplicity of our services. In fact, having celebrated so many holidays so close together, I think we may have even gained a new appreciation for straight-forward, mundane, basic services. The frills and additions can be fun and exciting; but when we’re back to normal and routine, that feels pretty welcome as well. Again, one isn’t good and the other bad; both just ARE, and both experiences are deserving of our blessings. Bitter is an important flavor as well, just like all the others.
“Happy” Marcheshvan! :-)
Rabbi Gerber
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